14 things I have learned as a Catholic

I recently crossed 4 years as a Catholic this past April and decided to share a bit of my journey so far and things I have learned along the way.

So here we go ! A list of 14 things I have learned in my short life of being a Catholic :)

1) Learning the language of God

My physical senses have become an antenna to receive both God’s love and experience His presence within me and around me at all times - from feeling the hair rising on the back of my neck, to suddenly feeling chills, to breaking out into a sweat, to seeing numbers that mean something to me, even on a license plate, to seeing rainbows in the sky, not to mention being sensitive to particular fragrant essences, to hearing the word of God, the list goes on and on - these are all ways that God uses to communicate with me. We do have to know ourselves well to know the difference between reception of signals from God and listening to our own inner voice.

2) Loving others as He loves us

Try to hug or love one person every day (if possible) just like you would hug or love Jesus. When you hug this person, really recognize that you are in contact with a creation of God - and that through loving them, you are showing your gratitude in being able to have the opportunity to love God this way, through honoring His creation. If you live in a family setting, then this is something you absolutely must cultivate within your family. And in that moment while you are loving them, ask your conscience what more you can do to love this person. In the past, I have kissed feet, hands, cheeks, etc. Does it always go great? Not really - sometimes the person is in such shock that you wish you had asked them for their permission, other times, I have had people burst into tears and cry on my shoulder. I have no idea what is about to happen, and yet I am always hoping that the Jesus in them understands my act of love, and if not, I tell the Lord, to try and amend the situation. St Joseph is usually who I go to in those instances :) Sometimes, if it is a priest, I have knelt before them and asked them for a blessing. By asking them for a blessing, they become aware of how important they are for me to receive blessings from God.

3) Be authentic in your relationships

Whoever you are, whatever walk in life you are in, look at the people in your life - and honor them for what they are doing - if they are a school teacher , a doctor, a priest, a religious sister, a colleague that earns a lower or higher salary than you , a politician, a person you share your house with - honor them for being alive and for sharing space with you. A boss once told me, that there are certain people who are so useless in their job, that we should call them "Oxygen thieves". I laughed hard at the time. Today I will tell you confidently there isn’t a single oxygen thief around me - I call people out and I expect them to call me out. There is A LOT of work that needs to be done in our world. And we need people who do their work well - whether you are a doctor , a nurse , a teacher or a priest - there are expectations from you , and when you aren’t meeting those expectations, and you happen to be in my immediate circle of friends - I would be doing you a disservice if I didn’t tell you the truth. Don’t hold back from telling the people who you love the most about how you see them. And that works in both ways - share both with them - how amazing they are, how well they are doing, how proud you are of them, how much you appreciate them, and when you recognize that they are leaving a lot on the table - you can share that with them as well. This is why I love teaching others how to breathe; I can always enhance people’s awareness of how much they are leaving on the table by not breathing correctly.

4) Push the envelope

I like doing out-of-the-ordinary things from time to time - not to prove something to others, but rather to constantly check on how comfortable I am in my current state. I have walked into a meeting where everyone spoke Spanish while I didn’t - it was incredible to see the pain that everyone took to make me feel welcome. I have walked up to the kneeler to receive my communion without my shoes on, in a church setting. I have sat on the floor at adoration while everyone else sat or knelt at the pews. Every time I did something like that - it was because there was a particular nudge in my heart to do something more than what I was doing in that present moment, immediately followed by a pullback of not wanting to appear "too much" - In those moment, I always think about the woman who wiped her hair on Jesus' feet - if that isn’t "too much" I don’t know what is, and if I remember correctly, all her sins were forgiven. If the fruit of doing something crazy in the name of my love for God, leads to all my sins being forgiven, I don’t mind pushing the envelope from time to time. It is super important to remember that even though my sins being forgiven is a GREAT bonus, it isn’t really the reason I am doing it in the first place. I am doing it because I want to do something extra special for the person I love, and I like surprising him from time to time with new acts and ways of loving him.

5) Our mission as Catholics is to spread love

As long as we are breathing, we are on mission. This is why I continue to teach people to breathe correctly, so that they can breathe for as long as possible until God's desire for them to go to heaven is higher than the call that they have of spreading the good news in the world. Our mission is to always spread the love, the kind of love that God loves us with. One of the greatest disservices we can do is to believe we have too many weaknesses to be able to carry out this basic mission. Don’t ever worry about having too many weaknesses. My experience has shown me that the Lord uses EVERYTHING to bring to fruition His will, including our weaknesses. I am grateful that He uses both my weaknesses and my strengths.

6) Be open to being surprised by God

This leads me to the next point that we will most likely  not be recognized, loved and appreciated by the people we most desire such love and endearment from. I have a funny story about my experience with a couple I was showing around the city one time - we were walking uphill and the wife was complaining to me that her husband doesn’t pay attention to her needs. So to prove this to me, she said very loudly - honey can you give me some advil, I have a splitting headache ! Instantly the person next to her on the other side of the walk way, shouted back saying - oh I have some advil let me get you some ! The wife, immediately responded saying - "no I am trying to prove a point to my friend that my husband doesn’t listen to my needs." I chuckled and called her out on the fact that she was more concerned about the fact that what she desired (the advil) wasn’t coming from the direction she wanted it to come from (her husband). But it had indeed come from another direction that she failed to notice and honor ! She ended up taking the advil from that person and thanked them profusely, while also praising God at the same time for her head was aching a lot and she got some relief from taking the medication. But she definitely had a point to prove - and that’s how we can be with God sometimes. If we are convinced of something, we will end up seeing things exactly in the way we are convinced they are. My friend was in need of advil and so she should have been more focused on the fact that she got the advil, yet she was saddened by the fact that her request or plea was ignored by her husband. When we are open to being surprised and are open to receiving love from all directions, God has many more opportunities to surprise us with beautiful gifts throughout the day, even in the form of Advil, and it doesn’t always have to come from the direction that we are expecting it to come from.

7) Who is going to heaven?

Don’t worry so much about who else around you is going to heaven - you have enough on your plate being concerned about your own salvation. Those of you who find yourself worrying about others' salvation and find yourself from time to time feeling that you know what others need to do to attain salvation - remember Mother Teresa's words , "those who judge don’t have time to love." The moment you find yourself being concerned or worried that others arent getting it ? Congratulations ! Now you know how others think about you.

8) Pay attention to living saints

The people you have usually made an impact on - you will probably never remember them or worse, you werent paying attention to them to begin with. Because you were busy trying to impress the people who werent really impressed by you anyway. And so never take for granted the people that are quiet around you or you don’t notice as being important enough. They might just be the ones who are praying for you every day.

9) Jesus is perpetually waiting to spend time with you

Think of the person who you love the most in life and then think about how you feel around them. That’s how Jesus feels around those who wants to spend every single moment with Him. He is excited to share with you his day, his feelings, his thoughts. I am not joking. I have a spouse who talks to me all day. I don’t ever worry about not having enough to do - he definitely keeps me busy.

10) Nothing is beyond forgiveness

Try not to fixate too much on WHO is giving you the message, rather be fixated on WHAT the message is, and if it resonates with you, then that particular day - the Lord may have used the mouth of a sinner or a pagan to deliver a message to you. You have no idea how people live their lives, once they leave the stage or the podium or your conversation for that matter. None of you know how I drove to meet you, how many times I broke the rules by going through a red light, or how many people I honked at, or if I was looking at my phone while driving , things that I should really not be doing and it could lead to some one getting killed. This also helps you be more compassionate when people like myself make mistakes or do unforgiveable things. There should be nothing that is beyond forgiveness for us as Catholics - if Maria Goretti's mother could forgive her daughters killer, I don’t think we have much to say on why we cannot forgive some one. Every time I think about Maria Goretti's mother, I immediately think of Our Lady - that is essentially what she did. If she were to become the mother of all -including the Romans that killed her son, she definitely knew what it meant to forgive those who killed the one she loved the most. Not to mention I think about King David being in pain when his own son is killed, even though that same son was trying to kill him ! THAT is example of forgiveness, THAT is an example of love - that is what we are called to live as Catholics. So try not to pedestalize any one, the less you do this, the easier it become to forgive those who hurt you.

11) Love and pain go hand in hand

 You are always most hurt by the ones you love and look up to the most . I have been hurt by Jesus , and the day I cried and screamed and shouted at him - I also realized that day I was most dependent on him, and that even though I was so angry with him, I also realized I couldn’t live without him. Be that vulnerable, love that much. Cry and hurt that much - scream that much. It is ok to tell some one how much they hurt you because it in turn also shows that person how much you love them. Ofcourse it might not always end up in a good place. In my case, I am grateful that all Jesus did in that moment was to hold me close as I tried to push him away and eventually, I wept on his shoulder for all the times I felt abandoned by Him. But I also felt His reassurance that He would never let me go again, and that my experience of feeling abandoned and after that being reassured, was what I needed to be sent out as a disciple. Just like when he appeared to Thomas, his faith was reinforced so much, that he ended up being one of the apostles that went as far as he did, incidentally to the state that I am from. Similarly, my doubts, my anger, the reassurance I needed - the Lord will indeed use it for me to go far and wide.

12) Pain and discomfort brings out holiness

Most often we see the holiness of a person come out when they are in terrible pain. I remember the days when I had to deal with a completely broken marriage while I continued to teach. My students were in complete shock that I could still teach during those days. Truth is I never doubted that was what I was supposed to do in that moment. I also remember being wheel chaired in and out of holy mass right after my knee surgery, and one of the sisters said that I was the happiest patient in the house - I have to admit, it hurt to even smile in those days, but I knew scientifically that smiling reduced my pain and so I smiled a lot those days :) . And yet now when I look back, I realize how the Lord had made me strong enough to be able to smile even in those instances. Smiling in the face of peril takes strength, one that comes from faith. Another reason why I continue to teach people how to breathe - so that they can understand how much more pain they can take on before they break when they learn how to breathe correctly.

13) How you live does matter.

Live by yourself at least once in your life, live in community at least once in your life. Experience both. Don’t get too attached to either. Of course, when you are married, you don’t really have that option. Or if you are a student and pretty broke ,that might not be an option either. But if you ever have to make a trip on pilgrimage and have the finances to book a room alone, don’t hesitate to room with someone you have never met before. You might end up meeting people who might become your new spiritual friend.

14) Do small things with great love

The smallest thing you can do is breathe. Being able to offer every breath to God is worth the journey of learning how to be more intentional about the way we breathe. In order for Him to increase, I have to decrease. The more intentional you become about the smallest thing you have to offer, the easier it becomes to become intentional about everything else. It becomes easier to let things go, not harp, and allow for more opportunities for Him to increase.

There you have it ! I am looking forward to hearing what you have learned on your own personal faith journey (Catholic or otherwise) and what resonates with you in the list that I have shared.